I started spotting today, and I'm certain AF will be here in the morning. While I'm sad because that means this cycle has come to an end, it also means it's time to begin again. It means in 5 or so weeks I'll be having eggs retrieved, and shortly thereafter waiting to see if this new little one stuck.
My nurse is going to call me tomorrow and I'll tell her it's day 1, and she'll hopefully start me on 3 weeks of birth control pills. If it's anything like last time, I'll get my period 2 days or so later, and then stims will start around day 4. In theory, if things actually go as planned (which never actually happens) my retrieval would be around the end of June.
I hope that things actually go this way. I need to be working on another cycle - looking forward. I feel like we can start the cycle without our "WTF" appointment as long as it comes pretty quickly, and I can talk to her before she orders meds. I don't want to do the same protocol as last time, so I need to make sure she knows that before it's time to place the order. We also need to make sure we're approved through insurance again, but we have 3 weeks more for that. And, finally, we need to take out a small loan. We wouldn't need it if we pushed the cycle back a month or so, but I just don't want to do that unless they make me. With a loan this small, we can make the monthly payments while still putting a bunch in savings so if, God forbid, we needed a third cycle, we could just pay for it outright.
I'm hopeful about this cycle. I feel like we might be able to get blasts to transfer, since we had one this time to freeze. I feel like with a new protocol we might get more eggs. And I know what to expect. The last cycle was such a learning experience for both the doctors and us, and we now know what my response is like. I know what sort of time commitments are involved, and what the retrieval and transfer are like. My husband is informed, and he wants to be more involved this time, so that's nice (though he came to the big appointments last time).
I told my parents about the new cycle starting right away, but I asked them not to tell anyone. We're not going to get into details this time, because it sucks telling them when it doesn't work out. I only need off for retrieval and transfer since my clinic's monitoring hours are so early, and by then I'll have the time off without much worry, so I'm keeping it all to myself. I'm also planning at least 1 night at the beach for Andy and I so we can get some relaxation in between transfer and beta.
I'm hopeful for this cycle. I'm sad that the first one didn't work out, but I'm excited to start again, and hopeful that with everything we learned last time, things will be smoother this time and we'll get pregnant and have the baby we've been trying so hard for.
They might ask me to wait a month since we're doing a fresh cycle, but I hope not. We'll find out when I Talk to the nurse tomorrow. I'm ready to do this again. I'm excited. And I hope that it works.
No comments:
Post a Comment