Yesterday was one of those days. I have them about once a week. A day where I just feel low... where bfp after bfp makes me think "Everyone else gets pregnant on their first IVF!" Of course I know this isn't the case, but there are days where it feels like it is, and usually on those days I turn to google hoping for.. well.. hope. Unfortunately what I usually get is the exact opposite. On google, so many more people have failed IVFs than successful ones (again, not true, but it feels like it sometimes). And I end up having to retreat home to my husband and have him make me feel better. I hate Google.
In other news, my ovaries are active. I felt it yesterday at work. This... full sort of feeling. I felt it again last night. It makes me hopeful that something is going on in there, but worried that I can feel it because they're too big already again. I'll find out tomorrow for sure, and I'm excited to see what happens, but I hope there's good news and my follicles are uniform.
I've been worried I won't have enough leave to take off 2 days for the retrieval and a day for the transfer, but my fears were put to rest today! I worked on Saturday, but it was an on call thing, not a regular shift. I had to join a conference call just about every hour, and it sucked, but we were told we'd only get comp time for while we were on the calls. When I got in, the other girl had gotten 7 hours, and I ended up getting 6.5! I only needed 3.5, so now I've got 3 extra! I'm so happy that I don't have to freak out about this all week, and now I can go into my procedures knowing I have the time I need.
I could really use two days off. I say that all the time, but part of me is happy to just be home for those two days with nothing to do 'cause it hurts to move. I like video games. And I will be playing lots of them. Hooray!
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