Ugh. Hubs and I have been getting in so many arguments lately! My OCD is driving him insane (and me, too). It's better, but still a pain in the ass. I hate when we argue. We both tend to get so mad so quickly and spout off nonsense and neither one of us are happy with our argument-solving skills right now. One thing I adore about my husband, though, is his willingness to listen and talk and come up with solutions to things like "we're arguing too much". We've come up with a little plan to help us each to gently remind the other when we're overreacting to things or getting too upset. We do that sort of thing a lot and it seems to help. We love each other and I'm glad to have a partner who will work with me. He doesn't always act like he hears when I have issues with things, but he normally works on them anyway, and I really just want us both to take a chill pill.

I think what we need is a vacation. He likes his job but it's incredibly stressful. I like my job, but sometimes I just need time away. And while things are improving, we're still dealing with my kidneys, my OCD, and baby things. And like it or not, IVF cycles are stressful no matter how excited you are. I think once this cycle is done, successful or not, we need to just take a few days. We need to re-focus a little on ourselves. Everything is all about the baby to me, but hubs and I deserve some time to just be together and enjoy each other as well. And not just on anniversaries. While ideally we could take a week and just go to a beach somewhere, it would be nice just to get one full day and night without a ton of stuff to do and without worries. I think we can accomplish this somehow.

He tends to worry so much about the house being clean and little things like that, but I'm hoping that on Saturday I can convince him to forget about it. To have dinner and spend a night laying in bed watching movies. Then on Sunday we can sleep in and then we're going to a little party. I don't know if I can do it, but I'd like to. I love just being with my husband when things are calm. I love being with him 99% of the time, but we haven't had as many calm evenings lately to just enjoy each other. So for now my plan is to just be with him. I'm on the birth control pills, and there's not much else for me to do for the next 2.5 weeks, so I'm going to try to just put the IVF out of my head a little (once I get the note from my nephrologist in) and focus on me and hubs and relaxing.

Don't get me wrong - I'm very excited, but with the excitement comes the "what if this happens, what if that happens, what if what if what if" and that is stressful. So I'm going to try not to think too much about it until I need to inject myself with things and get the retrieval. I don't know if I'll be able to accompish this, but we've had SOMETHING to deal with for every freaking moment of every day since we got married, and right now it's about damn time we relaxed and just cuddled and took care of each other. So that's the plan. I hope he likes it lol.