Well.. I did get an anniversary surprise of EWCM (you're so glad I told you, right?). I'm not sure what this means, but it would be neat if it meant impending O. Just peace of mind I suppose. And now I'm going to reveal a secret. Well.. it WAS our anniversary... and now I'm kind of hoping we somehow conceived. Given all the problems we've been having with MFI and my TSH and the fact that my cycle was all screwed up, we've kind of assumed that it's not going to happen naturally, so we're not worrying too much about it. But at the same time, we know it's possible, and there's a daydreamy little piece of me that can't help but think about how cool it would be. It's not going to happen though. But just so I don't sound like a totally horrible person, the prednisone I'm on is a category B-C medicine... they were going to have me conceive while still on it. And my kidney problem does pose some potential risks, but I was going to be high risk either way. So while it's probably not the most responsible, we're not being complete idiots.
I dunno.. the whole thing seems so silly, but I keep thinking about all those stories of people who were about to go through IVF and conceived naturally or the girls from "I didn't know I was pregnant" who ovulate once every 6 months and still caught the egg. And I wonder if it could happen to me. Well... I'm still planning on losing weight and starting IVF in January/February. I really hope it works. I keep thinking about and wondering about how it's going to go. If I'm going to get through the HSG and not need more tests. If I'm going to be able to lose the weight (2 last week.. 15 to go). If I'm going to stim ok, if they'll get any eggs, if we'll have any freeze, If I'll over-stim and have to cancel. There are so many "what ifs" And it's driving me nuts. I want answers now and I can't have them.
I need to chill out. Does anyone have an valium lol.
Glad to hear that O might still be coming. Remember that EWCM doesn't always equal O. But based on your last few cycles it probably does. :-)
ReplyDeleteI too have heard manys stories of women right before IVF, IUI, Clomid, lap, HSG, etc. get their BFP. Too many ancronyms in that last sentence? ;-) Wish you luck. I plan on taking a break in December/January if I don't get my BFP or a regularish cycle by then.
I hate that EWCM doesn't always mean O lol. It has in all my recorded cycles but this one is very wacky so I'm not really thinking it does. I can't help but wish and dream though.
ReplyDeleteI hope you get your BFP before then and no break is necessary. Breaks can be a much needed reprieve but they carry with them their own stresses do here's hoping you don't have to worry about it!!