Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Water. Lots of Water.

Copious amounts of water (and/or tea) leads to rude middle-of-the-night awakenings. Just one more thing I can only hope baby appreciates. I'm really trying to get healthy! Last night I forwent House for a dip in the pool... or a 45 minute deep water jog session, as it were (Ok, that was all for me. I love the water). i'm currently eating home made fried rice when there are chicken cheese steaks downstairs with gloppy cheese and mayo! It's ok, though, 'cause my body is a soon-to-be home for a mini human and I need to support her the best that I can! I have actually had a serving of vegetables today, and it's only 1:30. The other day I had 3 servings of fruits (who am I!?).

Alright, alright. It's not ALL for baby. It will be cool to wear whatever I want and not get winded walking up one flight of stairs. But most importantly, I need to be healthy for baby's health, and, by default, my health. I want to be a good role model, too. I don't want my child growing up seeing mommy eating fast food all the time and sitting on the couch with bags of cheese curls. I plan to enroll in some sort of mommy-and-me tumbling class when my baby is old enough. I want to start with the RIGHT habits right away, and that starts with me. Right now.

I don't know how long it will take DH to be able to be considered "fertile". I did hear that the HCG spikes testosterone 2 hours after taking it (holy fast, batman!) and that it is gone within 48. I guess that's why he is taking it every other day.. to keep his testosterone at a high enough level at all times that he can start producing more testosterone on an even keel. With that said, I don't know if we're going to be able to give April a shot or not. AF should be coming in the next few days, and then 17-19 days later, O, so if we ge tthe HCG by the end of the week we'll have about 2 1/2 weeks of it before then. I'm REALLY hoping we get to give April a good ol' college try, but if we're not quite there yet, at least I'll have been working on my nutrition and health and ready to keep it going. I think as I lose weight and get more water and better nutrition, I might have a better, more distinct ovulation. I'm terrified that we'll get Andy up to par and then there will be something wrong with me. Hopefully this helps.

I have to admit it's driving me insane thinking about trying in April and not being able to. I want this child more than anything. I'm having a bad day, but I'm definitely getting depressed thinking that it'll be October, November, December, and I still won't be pregnant and my friends will (not that I don't want them to be, I just want ME to be, too!). And I know that Andy should start getting better right away, and that we put this July timeframe on IVF (which I kind of want to push back to August now that he's got a new medication), which, although scary, has a high success rate... I just... I'm scared. I will do anything to have this baby. There have been times when I thought I couldn't lose weight or that I didn't want to do an HSG... right now I don't care. I just want my baby, and I know that losing weight and getting healthy is going to help. If Andy can give himself shots in the leg every other day, I can say no to fatty, caloric foods. We're both doing our part. I'm hoping and praying and WORKING for this baby. I want her here as soon as possible. I'm still hoping for April or May or June. We'll do what we can, and until then, keep working towards the best possible me.

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