The Dreaded HSG Story

Anyone that has been reading my blog knows that I have been absolutely horrfied about this HSG procedure. I've put it off since June when it was first mentioned to me. This is mostly because I made the unfortunately mistake of reading stores on the internet. Some of these stories began with "I wish I could tell you something different, but it wa sthe WORST pain of my life". I read tales of people throwing up and crying and yelling and screaming. And me... after having my midwife say "You're getting and HSG? TAKE VALIUM" becaus of my issues in those areas... well, I was unhappy. This entire last week has been dreadful. So many moments have been filled up with "I'll be able to look forward to Christmas soon because my HSG will be over". Well, my HSG is over. And here's how it happened.

I took 1mg of Xanax Sunday night hoping it would take the edge off. It didn't. So I took 2mg on the way there. I felt loopy, but not like a bumbling idiot. It honstly felt lie having a really good buzz except my legs were a little woozy. I also took 800mg motrin (which I'm not supposed to have so don't tell anyone). I honestly don't thnk these helped with the pain except in 1 instance which I'll explain later. We were running very late because of traffic. It was a 45 minute drive according to my GPS, but it took us 2 hours. We'd left early, so we were only 5 minutes late for the actual appointment (though we were supposed to be there 30 minutes early). As soon as I sat down they called me back. I spoke with a nurse for a few minutes who answered my questions and put me at ease. I told her I was nervous, and she gave me the great news that my actual doctor (from a different office!!!) would be dong my procedure! Then took me back to the room. It was very familiar looking except it had a little more equipment. I undressed from the waist down and put on a gown. They had a huge pad to sit on and a reglar hospital pad for afterwards. When I came out, I sat on the table waiting for the doctor. She came in not 3 minutes later, had me put my feet in stirrups and scoot all the way down, as per usual. She put the speculum in, which, of course, is not comfortable, but it was less uncomfortable than my last pap. I could tell she was cleaning in there but barely - I almost didn't feel it. and then she said she was done. I assumed she meant with the setup, so I said "with the setup you mean?" and she said "No, you're all done". I couldn't believe it. I felt NOTHING.. and I mean that. Nothing. I sat up and she showed me the xrays and the spillage and I said "that was less uncomfortable than my last pap!". She said I was the second person to say that that day. The x-rays were SO COOL. I could see my uterus and tubes, and the dye spilling freely from both. It was amazing. And oddly enough, I didn't get any "spillage"... like onto the table when I sat up. I did bring a pad from home because I do expect something at some point, but... nothing so far.

I think the xanax helped a little just in that I was more relaxed than normal. I think how tense I am is probably what makes my paps uncomfortable. But the dye? Nada. I can't believe how little it hurt. I sat up, got dressed, and I'm at work. Andy drove and is picking me up because of my medication, but I would've EASILY been able to do it myself. So now I'm sitting here, hours later, with not a cramp in site. To be honest, and this is TMI, I'm a little gassy, and I feel bubbles, but that's it. It was easily smoother than an annual exam, and if they told me I had to get one tomorrow I wouldn't hesitate. I didn't feel the catheter go in, I didn't feel a balloon... nothing. From the time I was on the table and they put the speculum in it was literally 1 minute. Maybe 1:30.

AND everything is PERFECT. My uterus is actually smack in the middle.. perfect triangle shape with my tubes almost evenly distanced on either side. The dye spilled out so fast I didn't even have to roll over. No fibroids, no polyps, no scars... perfect. So now I can stop freaking out about the random pains. And I know I have an actual shot to get pregnant naturally!!!!! Once my kidneys are good, we've done EVERY test. I can literally sign papers and start BCPs immediately!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't believe what great news. Finally something has gone our way in fertility land!!!! My uterus is ready for a baby!!!

Edit: I noticed in re-reading that I had a LOT of typos. Please pardon those.. it was the xanax (which I really expected to knock me out but it did no such thing). Also, I feel SOMETHING "down there" which might be intestinal, or it might be the mildest cramp ever. Either way... I am a jackass for getting so upset. Andy's been taking his meds, and I'm down to 40mg prednisone every other day as of January.. Hail Mary cycle here we come. Oh.. she did mention I need to lose weight. Yes I know. I'm back on the train soon. Promise, RE.