Two days ago, I congratulated a fellow "soul cyster" on her "pretty uterus". Oh dear. How times have changed. I don't think that if you'd told me a year ago that I'd be as excited by such things as pretty uteruses...uteri?.. as I am that I would believe you. I hope my uterus is pretty, too.

On a completely separate note, I've gained 26 pounds in the last 6 months, and we all know how conducive that is to helping a PCOS woman get pregnant! In my defense, some of it was due to long-term high-dose steroids. At least some of it was not. I plead insanity. I did write up a new program. It's not so easy to lose weight when the one problem you have (PCOS) requires you to eat unrefined foods and whole wheats and grains and proteins, and the other (kidney diease) requires you to eat none of those things, because protein is bad for me in large doses, and the others are full of phosphorus, which is bad for my kidneys. This might be a fantastic example of a catch-22. Or the worst karma ever. I'm going to attempt to eat moderate amounts of everything. This may or may not help.

Oh, by the way, I'm terrified today that I'll never have a child. My kidneys have been killing me lately. I do not know why. Kidneys don't generally hurt. Mine do! And I don't know what it means, but I had to cancel my doctor's appointment. One day I hope to find out if my kidneys are still stable. If not... well... I'd prefer not to think about it. I will just hope that they are ok. Maybe my husband's brain tumor and my kidneys should have a pow-wow and discuss how much they really should start behaving. One of them has to be a good influence, right?

I'm also headed to a GI doctor because my regular doctor thinks I have ulcers (I wonder what would have caused that?). That would explain the constant pain under my ribs I suppose. I love my Lord and Savior, but I think he missed a few pieces when he put me together. I swear I'm not a hypochondriac and I really do have these issues. I told someone once that our house was the center for rare diseases lol. Thankfully non-genetic.

I had a dream I was pregnant two days ago. It was interesting. Usually I'm a 3rd party in dreams, but I was sitting there looking down on a baby belly. If only it were actually possible for me to be pregnant right now. I'd think the dream and the nausea were onto something! Alas, maybe next month.

We're still waiting. 7 weeks to go until the next SA. Hopefully I won't be in the looney bin by then. And then... FINALLY we'll have a plan. Man I can't even type it with a straight face. Ok. HOPEFULLY we'll have a plan!!! We're still planning for a July Pregnancy. this is founded in absolutely no scientific evidence. My mom and I are "feelers". And apparently optimists. That's a new one.