Mini Updates

This big boy is almost 5 months old and about to start solid foods. I can't believe the time has gone so fast. He's finally taking 5-6oz bottles and therefore finally napping. And sometimes sleeping OK at night. He's in a growth spurt so he's STARVING but prior to that he was sleeping 8pm-6am with 1 night waking, so that's not bad. He is so happy and just SUCH a joy!!

In other news, I'm about to start potty training Evie. I don't know what method to use, but she's ready, and I'm just trying to figure out if I want to let her run around without a diaper or use pull-ups so she can feel when she's wet. Too many decisions and my babies are TOO GROWN UP.

Pictures and How I'm Happy

I feel like I'm really settling into this mom of two thing. There are tough days every so often, but for the most part it's great. Sometimes I feel like I don't get to give Evie enough individual attention, but then Andy will offer to watch Andrew a while after work, or I'll get him to sleep so we can spend a quality bed time together. I can tell that she is feeling extremely attached to me right now and it melts my heart. I get to spend time with Andrew bonding when he eats and when she's in bed and in the middle of the night, but I can't leave him for long to play with her, so it's just great when Andy's not working (which has been a lot with school). She's definitely a momma's girl. Yesterday I went upstairs and she asked Andy "where is my mommy"? OMG! Today my parents called me and she said "Hi Mommy"! in the phone. I am just so blessed to have such an amazing daughter. And my son, too. I feed him and as he gets done with the end of his bottle he starts giggling and we just look at each other and crack each other up. We're so in love.

Evie absolutely adores her brother. She likes to rub his hair and give him TONS of kisses. This was the closest I could get to a picture of the two of them but I swear she loves him. 

We went to the park and I didn't get a lot of pictures, but my mom entertained tiny and he was pretty happy. He has the most adorable little laugh.

He's a Sox fan like us!

And here he is, just being cute. He's growing up so fast. He's in that lovely stage where he's always overtired and screamy, but Evie went through that too and it was short.

I can't wait until Andy has a 9-5 job because we seriously have the best kids and just to spend the weekends together is my goal in life right now. God's timing is miraculous and I'm so thankful.

Moving Right Along

I've been pretty terrible about writing in this blog lately. The truth is simply that life is busy (and tiring). I work full time and spend just about every moment I'm not working taking care of the kids. Really it's a wonderful way to live, I just wish I got more sleep! Andrew is 4 (FOUR!!) months old now. I can't believe how fast the time has gone. He's almost 12lb now, so he's still a tiny little guy, but he's huge to me since he started at 4lb 7oz and was under 4 at one point. The other day I put him in a 6m (albeit a SMALL 6m) set from Carter's and it fit him. Normally that would be the expected size but I was sort of (really) surprised since he's a preemie.

He's doing really well. He's trying so hard to roll back to front. He can do it, he just gets stuck on his arm sometimes. He's sitting better and better. When he's hungry in the boppy he does these baby sit-ups. I don't think he realizes he's doing it, but I'm less and less worried he won't be sitting up by 6 months like the doctor wants. It seems odd to me since his adjusted age will be just over 4 months, but if she thinks he can do it then I think he can do it. We'll be introducing solids next month which is pretty cool.

He generally goes to sleep at about 8. On a good night he sleeps until 6 and wakes up once. Normally he wakes up twice, so I'm tired, but it really isn't so bad. And he's pretty consistently sleeping at least 8-12 so I can relax and unwind a little since Evie is in bed by then too.

All in all, life with two kids is amazing. Evie is a fantastic big sister. AND she's caught up so much with her language. The SLP says she's gained a year in the last 6 weeks and if she was like this the first time she came out she'd have said Evie didn't need her help. Everyone says she'll be fine for kindergarten. Which is good because she's so smart. She sits there and counts and does colors and shapes. She's just such an amazing kid and she's gotten so cuddly. I get kisses and hugs and her brother gets showered with love from her! She's no longer crying when I drop her off at daycare, and she's startig to become engaged in the class. Every so often there's a difficult day, but for the most part I LOVE being a mom to two small kids. I'd have another tomorrow if my kidneys would allow it.

It's like a tattoo. Once you have one you just want more and more!

3 Months Old and an Updat

Parenting 2 children is definitely a skill that takes some time, but for the most part I think I'm doing well. Sometimes I feel like Evie is missing out on mommy time because Andrew needs me so much, and that part is hard. I have to hold him a lot and she comes over to lay on me and I put my arm around her and try to explain to her that Andrew can't do anything for himself so I have to. She doesn't seem torn up over it, but she has g otten extremely cuddly (which I like). She's always laying in my lap, hugging me, snuggling into my sides, and generally being a sweet mommy's girl. Andy took her to the store yesterday and she was saying "mommy mommy" the whole time! She's still not happy with daycare, but I think things may improve. We finally got to talk with the people from the Infants and Toddlers program, and they said she has a sensory processing disorder. Right now I'm thinking it is THE sensory processing disorder (SPD) because she fits it so well. Now that I have her program in writing I can bring it to daycare and go over everything with them so they can put her in the best classroom and make sure they're not expecting things of her that she can't do. Children with SPD are often gifted in intelligence, but their sensory integration dysfunction causes problems with motor skills and things. We're working with Evie and have gotten her some things to help her so she can be caught up to the other kids in fine motor skills for kindergarten.

Her speech is picking up a lot. She says all sorts of words and phrases now, but it's still not enough. We still need to take her to Kennedy Krieger for an official diagnosis and make sure her SPD isn't part of some other disorder. My guess would  be that it's standalone, but we need to know for sure so they can put her program together. At least I now know why she's always standing on her head and throwing herself around and just so crazily full of energy. Why she doesn't color (she can grasp the crayon, but she can't push down hard enough to make marks) or use utensils. An Occupational therapist is coming to work on these things with her. The thing is she's smart - she counts and does colors and letters and things, but we cant sit with her and work on learning because she can't concentrate, so hopefully these things will help with that. And hopefully once the daycare folks understand her behavior, they will stop acting like she's being the "bad" kid. It's not behavioral - it's neurological. And they can work with her on improving her skills as well.

Andrew is doing well. He still rolls front to back, and he can roll back to side. He smiles a lot and can bat at toys. He LOVES laying on his play mat talking to his octopus. He's just such a joy to be around. He does not sleep well, though. He's still doing 3 hour stretches, which means I have to get up and do everything, put him back to bed, then fall back asleep myself, so I don't get 3 hour stretches. It's tough because I am so exhausted and yesterday I thought I would break down. This has been going on for over 2 months now, but because he's so little, he's not ready to sleep longer. He's just now a little over 10lb, and experts say at 11 they start to be able to sleep better. He just needs a ton of calories to put on weight. But mommy needs sleep desperately. Hopefully he will start sleeping better soon so I can catch up. I'm a mess right now. But looking at that sweet smile every morning reminds me how worth it it all is!

Daycare Woes

After some more evaluators came to the house, they decided that Evie has a sensory processing disorder. Difficulty processing multiple stimuli. Which basically equates to ADHD, but they don't want to call it that in a 2 year old, which is fine, but I will refer to it as such because it's easier and I'm lazy. They recommended daycare for her so she gets more interaction with other kids and structure. I put her in daycare last week. She goes Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, and she hates it. She screams when I drop her off and she cries on and off all day. They keep telling me that ALL kids do that at first. I have friend whose daughter cried for months. But it's making  me question my decision, and is the hardest thing I've done as a parent so far. It's so incredibly difficult to leave Evie there knowing she's miserable. She knows I'm going to come back by now, and the rooms are filled with kids, toys, and books, but she doesn't want to be there and I don't know why. I'm hoping she'll adjust but right now my heart is pulling at me to just yank her and keep her at home. But she's going to have to go to school eventually, and I don't want her doing this in kindergarten. I really am beside myself. Am I doing the right thing? I don't know. The state agency says yes. My heart says no. My head says she'll get used to it and start to have fun. I guess time will tell. It's only her second week and she had 4 days off so she may have thought she didn't have to go back. But she does. And I'm just praying it helps her and she starts to enjoy playing all day.

Andrew is doing well. He's been a little snotty and still doesn't sleep well, but he's such a doll. My parents kept him last night so I could sleep, and he kept them up all night, but that's just what he does because he's little. He'll adjust to life on the outside soon enough. He's such a wonderful little person. He's rolling over, and holding his head up well. He doesn't talk much, and really loves being on his mommy, but I enjoy it because one day he won't anymore. I just love to kiss his sweet head and cuddle him.

I love my kids so much. It's a challenging time for us but we're getting through it and I think if Evie can warm up to daycare we'll be in a pretty good place.

This is Evie arriving home after her first day of daycare. She was happy to be home.

Back to Work and Other Updates

Well, once again it's been a while since I've posted. A lot has been going on, and I think I'll break it down by baby this time.

Evangeline is doing well. She's such a happy girl and growing like a weed. She's in the 95th percentile for height but she's skinny. Probably because she's boycotting almost every food right now. I can get her to eat grilled cheese, pasta, egg beaters, and kix. Sometimes fruit pouches and yogurt if she's feeling saucy. I guess the big news is that the pediatrician had a few concerns at her last visit, so we got her evaluated. If you know me in real life, I ask that you please keep this part quiet. Someone from the state came out to do the evaluation in the areas of gross motor skills, fine motor skills, social/emotional, speech, and problem solving. She was fine in gross motor skills, but behind in the others (mildly except for fine motor. She's doing some things from her age group, but not enough to count as a "solid foundation" of 24 month skills), and the woman said she could see why the pediatrician was concerned about Autism spectrum disorders. We spent most of that day crying and just wondering why Evie would have issues. We knew her language was lacking a bit, but to think there was some big, underlying cause? We weren't expecting it. The next week the Speech pathologist came out (I'll refer to her as SLP) and did an evaluation, and we came out with a much better feeling. She said in her opinion, Evie has a simple speech delay. She said she doesn't have any of the big markers for autism spectrum disorders that she can see. She admitted that Evie doesn't follow directions, but she does think Evie understands. In her words, Evie is a "strong, independent female". She wants what she wants period. She said she has a big personality and is going to be a lot of fun to work with. She encouraged me not to stifle her, and to let her develop into an even stronger little girl. What was particularly interesting is that she was telling me phrases Evie was saying left and right that I didn't understand. She said she was certain of it because she's dealt with speech issues for so long. So I'm sitting there thinking Evie is seriously behind. Meanwhile she's sitting there counting "one, two, three!" and saying "ready, set, go!" and "Want that!" among others. She said Evie's saying a lot of phrases, she just wants to work with her on single words (which I've noticed she's already picking up on). I feel a lot better about that. I think we connected pretty well and she honestly believes it's just a delay. Woo hoo! We do have an occupational therapist coming to help Evie with some fine motor skills though. Andy and I think she has ADHD (which Andy has) and she has trouble concentrating to learn some of the skills like eating with utensils and using a cup. It's easier to use a sippy and eat with her hands and she doesn't have to focus on it. We'll see what they say on Thursday.

One cool thing about everything is that I've started really trying to pay more attention to Evie's language and so I'm picking up more of her words, which makes her happy, and helps me to translate for other people. She's also turned into a much more affectionate child. I can't say what's brought that on but I love it. She comes up and hugs people now. If I'm laying on the couch with my eyes closed, she comes up and curls up next to me, or puts her face on my face. She'll snuggle close and we'll give each other kisses. It's magical. And she adores her brother. When she comes downstairs in the morning the first thing she does is look for him. "Baby?" she'll ask. When she finds him she'll say "Hi baby" or "AWWWW baby"! She wants to snuggle him but he's little so I have to keep her away. She doesn't understand and it makes me sad, but he's still pretty fragile. When I pick him up and put his face to hers she gives him kisses, hugs, and just generally gets happy. She's such an amazing big sister.

Lately she's started to full on run very fast, jump with both feet, dance more, climb more, and try to help me with getting dressed and undressed. She knows when she needs a diaper change and is getting to the point where we can start with the potty. She starts daycare next week, which the SLP suggested to help with her speech. I think she's going to love it and she'll learn from other kids as well. Plus right now she gets too much TV since I have to take care of Andrew, so she'll get a lot more outside time and special activities. She's just such a joy to be around and I'm so blessed to be her mother!



Andrew is doing well. He's almost ten weeks old and up to 8lb 4oz. He can roll front to back! He holds his head up pretty well, too. He does not sleep very well. He's small, and he should only be 3 weeks old, and sometimes he acts like it. He's very sleepy, so he'll start eating and fall asleep before he gets enough, so he's hungry again in two hours. I'm exhausted because I don't get much sleep at night, but I'm getting used to it. I started back at work today and I'm still awake, so that's a positive. I think when he gets a little bigger he'll sleep OK. I do hope it's soon because I could use 3-4 hours at a time instead of 2. Unfortunately, like Evie, he has reflux. It was also causing trouble as he'd thrash and scream while eating and it hurt too much to take a decent amount of food. We started him on Zantac, and he's been doing much better.

It sucks so much to be away from my kids after spending so much time with them, but I know Evie is going to benefit so much from daycare, and it makes me appreciate being with them when I get home even more.

2 Years

Yesterday was Evangeline's second birthday. I cannot believe my daughter is 2. The truth is, she and her brother are the best things that ever happened to me. I love them more than I could ever express in words. Evie is just the most beautiful, sweet, smart, funny little girl I've ever met, and I can't believe how quickly the last two years have gone by. She's my best friend, and I am so lucky that I was chosen to be her mommy. When I look at her, everything that happened to lead us here makes sense. God's timing makes sense. Because she was meant for us, and we were meant for her. That's the only way I can explain it. Here are a few pictures of my sweet baby.

And as a little update, Andrew is doing well. We're not getting a lot of sleep, but it could be worse. He's so sweet and is just such a good baby. I'm still adjusting to having two kids, but it's really been better than I imagined it could be.